"Still, I always feel this strange estrangement..."

"Once More, With Feeling"

In a fit of nostalgia, I pulled up the musical episode of Buffy. I do love that episode, and I definitely enjoyed the show when it was on. Bless netflix for carrying it. As I was watching, I began to realize why I could not understand or accept the popularity of Twilight. In Buffy, the main character is a teenaged girl who happens to save the world. She does this multiple times, and often goes completely unawknowledged by the rest of the world. Joss Wheedon created a character who was the complete opposite of her archetype.

As a modern day feminist, how could I not relate to this character? So often, the teenaged girl is portrayed as the victim, helpless and unable to save herself. She's the archetype always in need of rescue or protection. Buffy rarely, if ever, really needs saving. Instead, she saves others and attempts to live a normal life while doing it. It's not always a pretty or glamorous process, especially when vampires and demons have a habit of crashing concerts and high school graduation. In that sense, it's an exaggerated version of real life, which so often gets disrupted by events completely out of one's control. It's the same struggle modern women face every day, gritting our teeth against glass ceiling and limiting stereotypes that want to portray a woman as less than capable.

Given that Buffy's role model that came out during my impressionable teenage years, how could I find anything admirable about Bella? I'd watched one teenger grow from an insecure girl to a woman who accepted her fate and responsibilities and learned to do it with unsung thanks. (Okay, so they did sing once.) Then a new, classic archetype comes on the scene. Bella embodies the exact opposite of feminist values, in constant need of protection, passively waiting for life and love to happen to her. Life does not reward such people, it runs over them.That's why Bella's archetype is that of a victim. If I am to met my fate, I would rather do it on my feet and fighting. As Buffy does.

"Heaven, I think I was in Heaven..."

Okay, fine, so I was singing from the musical episode of Buffy. Die-hard fans will just have to forgive me for taking the song lyric completely out of context. But that's not the point of writing today. Today, I'm documenting my experience at Stringtopia.

It was absolutely amazing! There was a new fashion trend emerging - the spindle hair stick. They do double duty - a wonderful spinning tool and a gorgeous hair accessory all in one. Here's one being modeled by the lovely AncientSpinner:


Of course, they also look fantastic with tiaras.


I got to meet Tsock Tsarina's new sock base. I can't wait to pick up a Golden West Kit when she re-releases them!


Would you look a those gorgeous sample skeins!


The Tsarina also brought along her turkish kuchulu. I couldn't believe how tiny it was, nor how tiny she was able to spin on it.


I also awheelerated Fernmonkey on sunday, when I loaned her my kiwi. I wish I had thought of it earlier! I only needed my wheel for the saturday spin-in, and I do believe she wants an Ashford joy now. I can't wait to see pictures of her new wheel when she gets it.

Stringtopia was a wonderful experience. In some ways, it felt like a fantastic family reunion. I met people who totally understood my passion for fiber and shared it. I still can't believe Tsock Tsarina can operate on 4 hours of sleep. I learned to make batts from Abby and now want a drum carder. It's her fault, really. Jacey taught us how to make stable, core-spun yarn, which is amazing. I want to weave a core-spun shawl now, and I don't even have a loom. Which is a problem Morgaine could totally solve, with her YarnV. My god, her haul of stuff was amazing. I was lucky I only made it out with this much stuff.


The beads were from the Bead Circus in Lebanon, but everything else was from Morgaine of Carolina Homespun. Words do not begin to describe the intoxicating treasure trove she carries in the Yarn V. The universe told me that I needed another lightweight spindle, so I got a Greensleeves Mjolinor that weighted a scant 0.6 oz. I knew she had the cotton candy abby batts and that they were destined to come home with me. But I made a concerted effort to get out of my color safety zone, as you can see, with the purple 50/50 cash/silk roving and the 50/50 camel/silk roving. That doesn't include the batt I made on friday, however, which turned into a glorious burgundy.

For those that want more photographic evidence, AncientSpinner on Ravelry posted an open facebook album for all of us to peruse. I know I'll be browsing through and remembering all the wonderful things that happened, from CraftMonkey and Breyerchick kidnapping me on saturday and talking me into staying on sunday, to the ice cream extravaganza. I still can't believe there was left over ice cream! Since I lived in Columbus, I offered to bring down Jeni's ice cream as a partial bribe of acceptance and friendship. I shouldn't have even worried, everyone was so warm, welcoming and wonderful. I can't wait to go back again next year!

The Knitter's Dilemma

So, I went to the store today where I was inundated with spring fashions. I loved the look of the romantic fashions, light and gauzy fabrics with lace everywhere from the back of halter tops to the main body of cardigans. There, I was struck with the Knitter's Dilemma.

I can knit that, I would find myself thinking that over and over and over again as I passed by one cardigan or the next. I recognized the diamond lace motif, the cats paw lace, the battenburg lace insets. Okay, fine, I have no idea how to make tatted lace, but I can recognize it. And it was as equally pervasive as knitted lace. It took quite a bit of willpower to walk out of the store without buying anything.

Certainly, I could knit a cardigan, but how long would it take me? Would spring be nearly over by the time I finished? There's a skein of Madelinetosh Prairie calling my name, and the hue is Molly Ringwald. That very shade of pink just begs to be knitted into something lacy and delicate. Plus, it's superwash, so I wouldn't need to worry about felting. I desperately want to cast it on right now! Except I'm working on a delightfully lacy shawl already. I hope the soothing feel of silk and cashmere can calm my fevered brain. Spring fever has possessed me and I want to knit something as bright and lively as the flowers that have begun to bloom.

The healing power of cashmere

It's been one of those days. I believe I met it with verve and spunk, but by the time I was ready to go home, I didn't have any verve and spunk left for myself. Went into work early this morning, and things were going well until I get this phone call to confirm some charges on my debit card. I promise you, I'd be a much warmer and happier person if I was in Arizona, where there's not snow on the ground. Turns out, my debit card number got stolen. Fantastic. It got caught really quickly, and I have a new card in the mail. But it ate at the back corners of my mind all day.

On top of that, work had stupid work politics that I finally had to stand up and face the music. If I could, I'd work quietly, without much interference, and without much attention from higher management. Maybe it's an old reflex from the parents, maybe it's just me, but I can't help cringing when higher management focuses their attention on me. It's not a comfortable feeling. Either way, I had to make some points, stand my ground, and put on the big girl panties. You know, this whole grown up thing isn't what it's cracked out to be. It's not nearly as much fun as it looked like when I was a kid.

So, when I got home, I decided to cast on the laminaria shawl. A while ago, the boyfriend had gotten me two gorgeous skeins of the Indie Knits II line from littleknits.com. Those of you that know me, are probably not surprised that it's burgundy. It's exactly the color of blood. Work hazard, sorry. I can add phlebotomy to my list of skills now, and I've been paying particular attention to the color of blood these days.

Anyways, the yarn is 55/45 silk/cashmere, and it is absolutely luscious. There's a teeny tiny halo that gives the yarn a gloriously soft hand. The pattern is great for comforting, absorbing knitting. It's the perfect thing to knit when all I want to do is pay attention to my hands and forget about the day. I'm starting the 3rd repeat of the star chart, and it's not the least bit mindless, not even the purl rows. If you don't pay attention to purling, you'll wind up with skipped or twisted stitches. I can't wait till I get to the other charts. I'm thinking the shawl needs beads.

I've decided I'm chronically incapable of knitting patterns as written. Already, I'm going to have to do a hybrid size, because I have about 720 yards of the lace and the large size for +1000 yards. I figure I should have enough for 5 repeats of the star pattern and 7 of the blossom. On top of that... do you see beads in that pattern? There's not. So, of course, I have to add them. I have the perfect beads too, some lovely opalescent size 6 seed beads. In burgundy, of course. If the weather holds true to its atypical pattern, the weather will be shawl weather. Given how quickly I normally knit, I may finish before winter finishes visiting us.

"I'm so sorry baby, it's just you drive me crazy"

-from a Bittersweet song.

In a desperate attempt to stop my brain from running itself into the ground, I figured I'd do an update here. I've finished my first ever hand spun, hand knit shawl that I designed from scratch!



It's not blocked yet, more teaser photos this weekend.

Why yes, I will sell this pattern, but first there has to be a pattern to sell. Which is what I've been working on for the last 3 hours or so. I was dreading writing up the pattern, because even though I took copious notes I forgot to record with meticulous detail how I negotiated the increasing edges. Yeah. About that. Oops.

Gamely, I plugged away at the shawl, getting the basics in. I was proud of myself, I had at least charted the main section repeats so aligning the different motifs was done. I was figuring my stitch counts for each section, determining how I would start the shawl; and, of course, writing this all down. Because no one else lives inside my head and if other people want to knit this pattern, I have to give them something that resembles cohesive instructions. I figured out a wee little short cut and I have high hopes to get the shawl out to test knitter(s?) in a week. Wish me luck.

TL;DR - the handspun shawl is knit on size 6 needles using a yarn that's approximately sport-weight. (No, I did not count wraps per inch. I was too eager to knit with it.) I had about 345 yards of handspun total, and after the shawl was bound off, I had 1 yard and 3 inches left. Talk about a nail-biter!

Gimpy McGrumpypants

That's who I've been for the last two months or so. For some reason, my knee started hurting so badly that it hurt to spin. Really! I know you're not supposed to spin for 3 hour straight without breaks, but it hardly seemed like a gigantic task after all the sports I used to do. What's 3 hours of treadling compared to training in kung fu 5 days a week a month before the tournament? I know, I know, it's been at least 5 years since martial arts, but the gimpyness shocks me. After a week of constant knee pain, I caved.

I finally caved and went to the doctor who sent me to the physical therapist. After 8 weeks of physical therapy and no real reduction in knee pain, they sent me back to the doctor. Once there, I finally got an appointment with an orthopedic doctor this monday. We'll see how that goes.

It's just.... hell! I'm 30 years old, how did I get this gimpy? It shouldn't hurt to exercise on a recumbent bike for 1 hour. I haven't a clue what's going on with me knee, other than I should fall on the cat instead of take a bad fall to avoid landing on the cat. Follow that one? Heh. I think it all started when DelilahDamnit, our aptly named cat, flopped on her belly in front of me. While I was walking, I might add. To avoid crushing her innards, I twisted to avoid stepping on her and wound up in a crumpled heap. She's fine, by the way, fluffy and furry as ever. Me on the other hand? Not so much.

It's so frustrating to have to remember every day that there's a list of things I can't do anymore. I can't sit cross-legged. I can't spin on my wheel for more than an hour. I can't exercise for over half an hour. I can't wear heels. I can't stay on my feet for hours on end. I have to remember to take medicine or my knee will ache for 3 days. Really? I thought this stuff was... well... supposed to happen in like 30 years, not within the first three decades of life.

It feels better just getting this out there. I don't know where I'm going next with this. Crafting makes it better, especially if I'm knitting something sumptuous. It's hard to remember that I have new, smaller limits that before. I'm really hoping the doctor has good news, because I can't make rhyme or reason of this knee injury.

Spinning my wheel(s)..

Sorry, it's been a while! Life has been delightfully busy, and I've neglected my time here.

A few weeks ago, some friends and I went to a Wool Gathering at Young's Dairy near Springfield, Ohio. If you haven't been, I highly recommend going, even if you live 4 or 5 or 6 hours away. It's a lovely collection of vendors selling everything from enameled jewerly and shawl pins to historical reinactors, wheel dealers, and fiber. Did I forget to mention the yarn? LOTS of yarn, including a ball of cashmere lace for $20 at 1000 yards a ball. That one came home with me.

So did this.

That's right, I've finally bought a spinning wheel. It's an Ashford Kiwi, a beginner's wheel to be sure, but I couldn't be happier with her. That skein hanging on the wheel is my first handspun. It's BFL. I've got high-flying dreams of decorating her, which is difficult to do right now, since I can't bring myself to stop spinning on my wheel. Even a serious cut on my thumb hasn't stopped me from spinning on my wheel. FTW, always cut away from the hand holding stuff. Ask me how I know. Atleast this time, I didn't need stitches. You'd think I'd have learned that by now, huh?

So far, I have worked out a plan to stain the wheel. First, I wanted water based stains and seals. Miniwax makes water-based stains and varnishes, for the record, which dry much faster than the oil-based ones. Plus, there's that whole issue of compatibility. I did my homework and found out that paint on varnish will not stick if you use things with different bases. Not surprising, since oil and water have never mixed well together. I plan on painting on the rim of the wheel after it's stained, but I'll be using water-based acrylics. I'm hoping that all this water based stuff is easy to clean up, given my lack of gracefulness lately. Plus, since it dries faster, it means less down time on the wheel. I'd get started this weekend except for the whole-cut-on-my-thumb issue. I have a slice on my wrist, too, but that one's shallow and I have no idea how I got it.

After getting dizzied and disoriented by the wide variety of supplies at Michael's where I bought my stain and varnish, I decided to lengthen the finishing process by holding off on purchasing the paints. I'll varnish the solid wood parts first, before continuing with the actual wheel. The actual wheel is not solid wood, but medium density fiberboard (MDF), and won't look like the rest of the wood once stained. I think I want to paint the wheel to resemble wood grain after I stain it. Depending on how much I like it, I may or may not decorate it with further stenciling in vines and flowers. Then I'll seal the wheel with varnish to protect the paint.

That's the plan anyways. It's harder to enact because I'm stuck more or less spinning until my thumb heals. Knitting hurts right now, but thankfully, I don't need a thumb to spin.